An Eight Week Call to Action
Tomorrow, my daughter will be two months old. As I reflect on these past eight weeks, as a first time mother to an infant, I can say with certainty, and a degree of embarrassment, that I severely underestimated the strength, fortitude, and physical effort that is required to manage the first few months with a newborn. The eight week marker feels particularly notable because that’s a common end date for many maternity leave policies for those, like me, who delivered via c-section. For traditional birthing mothers, it’s often even shorter, at 6 weeks.
When I think about what it would be like to return to work this week, I find myself examining where I’m at - physically and mentally. Even with 58 nights under my belt, it all still feels so new. I am just now able to comfortably load the car seat without feeling the pain of my incision. I am just now able to sleep without waking up in a panic, wondering if I put the baby back in her bassinet. And I am just now able to recognize the slight tone difference between a cry for food and a cry for sleep. With every “first” (smile, “coo,” finger hold) I can feel things turning the corner, but we’re not there yet. I’m still only sleeping in two hour increments. Still typing a million questions into Google. Still struggling to establish the daily routine for napping, feeding, and playing. And multiple times a day, I still have to pass my crying daughter to my work-from-home husband to soothe her when my heart can’t take one more upset tummy tear.
I’m not ready to be back at the office. Virtually or in-person. I can’t even imagine being asked to be. Developmentally, my baby can’t see more than 18 inches in front of her. She needs to be fed 8+ times a day. And although my husband and I believe she’s the smartest/cutest/strongest baby that ever existed ;) she's not even old enough to hold a toy or turn over unassisted. Even if I could secure childcare (and I can’t, because, of the 14 waitlists we got on, we only heard back from one and it isn’t even open yet) I’m not ready to let someone else care for her 45+ hours a week.
That’s why I am so thankful that I don’t have to just yet. I have 14 weeks of fully paid maternity leave. Not “take all of your PTO and then we’ll cover a 60/70% portion of your pay with a short-term disability plan” - but 100% paid. by. my. employer.
But that wasn’t always the case. Until earlier this year, our maternity policy was similar to many companies in the US. It took advocacy and data to get the generous leave we have today. It took multiple voices speaking into the issue and clear communication on how it directly aligned to my company’s core principles.
Today, as I sit here grateful to be at home soaking up smiles instead of staring at my computer, I have a few asks of those of you in my circle who, perhaps like me, underestimate the intensity of caring for a newborn or who want to proudly state that their business, or their employer, truly puts their people first.
To the business owners, executive team members, board members, HR leaders:
Find a way to offer paid parental leave and support your people through all stages of their lives.
At the very least, do the math. Don’t just assume parental leave costs too much. Find out exactly how much it is and examine what else your company spends money on that may not be as aligned to your values that could be reallocated. One popular option is to cover a portion of the costs with a Short Term Disability plan and then cover the remaining gap.
Think ahead and budget for it.
Take the time to think about your organization's values and how they translate into your policies. If your organization ever expresses interest in gender equity then find a way to avoid financially penalizing parents for taking the brief and necessary time to care for their child.
If this isn't resonating with you because you think you can’t afford to pay for someone that isn’t technically punching in every day, or it’s not fair to those that didn’t make a personal decision to have a child, at the very least consider it from a talent acquisition and retention perspective. It is increasingly hard for small/mid sized businesses to compete for talent right now. Offering fully paid parental leave, that only a fraction of your staff will ever actually use, is one way to stand out from so many that are not offering this very necessary benefit yet.
For non-formal org leaders:
Even if you aren’t in a formal leadership role, remember that your voice matters. All genders can (and should!) advocate for paid parental leave.
Find out exactly what your company currently offers. The truth is a lot of people don’t think about the policy until they have to and then feel awkward advocating for themselves.
Talk to your manager about why it’s important. (Happy to help you articulate that, if you’re interested!)
Send a note to your HR team recommending they add it to the benefits offering.
Put it in every employee survey/“suggestion box” that asks for your input.
Be a fearless advocate. Your voice might be the only thing needed to spark the conversation that could significantly impact people’s lives.
$400.14…$44.58…$279.90…343.85…$25.38… those are just the bills I paid THIS WEEK for having our baby - and we have amazing insurance. Not to mention the cost of a daycare, a crib, stroller, car seat, diapers, clothes, and countless other things I never knew existed until this year. It is one of the most expensive and physically demanding seasons for families. If we have the ability to eliminate the stress of reducing or eliminating a woman’s paycheck while she selflessly cares for her child, and we don’t, what are we really saying to the women that work for/with us?
I recognize we are still in a global pandemic and many businesses are running on fumes. I also acknowledge that it’s probably easier for the company I work for, a 300+ person tech firm, to budget for parental leave over a small coffee shop or a non-profit running on razor thin margins. I do still believe there is a way, it just might take a bit more creativity. I’d love to hear from any of you that have been able to successfully make this work so that others might learn from your experiences.
As a final note, I realize this is simply my own experience. There is an expansive range of thoughts and feelings as it relates to newborns and when a parent feels comfortable going back to work. I do feel confident that in a time of so much personal disruption, a consistent paycheck can provide the security and comfort needed to ensure healthier outcomes for the entire family. If we can’t currently rely on government funded paid leave, we must look to those who can make it possible: ourselves and our employers.
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For those curious, here are a list of some West Michigan employers that currently* offer at least 12 weeks fully paid leave**
*As of my research Nov 2021 when seeking data specifically on MATERNITY LEAVE. I do not have all the data as it relates to paternity/partner leave or adoptive family leave, but have listed it if it was shared.
**Details/nuance in language simplified for the sake of this list and some companies are very specific in their policies in order to be gender and situationally inclusive:
OST (where I work) - 14 weeks maternity leave. 4 weeks partner leave. 6 weeks leave for adopting parents.
Consumers Energy - 24 weeks maternity leave for birthing mothers. 16 weeks leave for non-birthing parent.
MillerKnoll - 8 weeks maternity leave + 4 weeks parental leave (mothers can combine these leaves)
Steelcase - 12 weeks maternity leave.
Metro Health / University of Michigan Health Foundation - 12 weeks maternity leave for salaried employees.
Wolverine World Wide - 12 weeks maternity leave.
Black Truck Media - 12 weeks maternity leave.
West Michigan Center for Arts and Tech - 12 weeks maternity leave + an optional 6 weeks at 50% pay for employees who have been with the org 1+ years. Employees with less than 1 year get paid 100% for 4 weeks.
Service Express - 12 weeks maternity leave for employees who have been with the org 1+ years. Employees with less than 1 year get paid a prorated amount. Parental leave for non-birthing parents is 4 weeks.
PNC - 10 weeks maternity leave for employees who have been with the org 1+ years + 6 weeks parental leave (mothers can combine these leaves)
Windquest Group - 13 weeks parental leave - includes both parents.
Global Companies with progressive parental leave policies:
Accenture - 16 weeks maternity. 8 weeks parental leave for primary caregivers. 2 weeks leave for secondary caregivers.
Airbnb - 22 weeks maternity leave for birth mothers. 10 weeks parental leave for non-birthing parents.
Alphabet (Google’s parent company) - 18 weeks parental leave.
Amazon - 20 weeks maternity leave (4 before birth, 16 after). 6 weeks paternity leave.
Apple - 18 weeks maternity leave. 6 weeks non-birthing parental leave.
Boston Consulting Group - 16 weeks maternity leave. 8 weeks paternity leave.
Dow - 16 weeks of parental leave - including moms, dads, adoption, surrogacy, etc.
Etsy - 26 weeks of parental leave.
Microsoft - 20 weeks maternity leave. 12 week partner leave.
Netflix - 1 year parental leave for salaried employees.
Nestle - 18 weeks parental leave.
theSKimm - 18 weeks of parental leave.
Twitter - 20 weeks for parental leave.
UKG - 12 weeks for parental leave.
Reddit - 16 weeks parental leave.
Pinterest - 20+ weeks parental leave.
Other interesting benefits:
4 weeks bereavement leave for pregnancy loss
12 weeks paid leave for NICU
Financial coverage for infertility medication and treatment
Financial coverage for adoption
$4,000 “baby bonus” to help cover expenses
$2,000 toward doula support
6 weeks of back-to-work flex schedule (fully paid)
Covering childcare up to 50%
$500 Maternity leave food stipend
Onsite daycare
Offering nighttime nursing/doula support during the work week
4 weeks off prior for the final stretch of pregnancy
Free access to pregnancy/parenting apps
Have any to add or need me to make a correction? Please let me know!
