My Annual Birthday Reflection: The “33” Edition

As I sit here in a lounge chair, X-ing my newest batch of Belizian bug bites, the the Caribbean waves serving as my soundtrack, I can’t help but wonder: how did I get here?

How did I end up 3,023.5 miles from home, with an 11 YO futbol fanatic, a 14 YO anime addict and a board-member-turned-friend-turned-husband?

I’ll start where it all starts, my parents. Somewhere along the line in their own friendship, they too, fell in love and started a family. And their collective influence around creating a life you love was a central parenting theme, even if it wasn’t explicitly communicated.

Through his actions, my dad demonstrated to my siblings and I, on top of many things, the importance of having fun. Of enjoyment and laughter, exploration, and openness. And it always felt like an open-invitation for any friend, family member, neighbor, or new acquaintance to join in on whatever the adventure of the day was.

I thought about that yesterday, while we were snorkeling above and around sharks and manta rays in the Silk Cayes. About how my dad was the root of so much of my love for water. From the adrenaline-inducing tubing rides of my childhood in that old Boston Whaler, to extreme sea doo-ing at our cottage on Lake Michigan, to accidentally overdosing on Dramamine while fishing in Drummond Island, and my never-quite-successful scuba attempts in Guana Cay. Being on, and in, the water was always an adventure. We learned to navigate obstacles as they arose (and they always did!) and to treat them as adventures instead of barriers.

But that’s not the whole story that led me here, to this place, today. There was a strong ying to my dad’s yang and her name is Suwilly. One (of the MANY) things I’ve come to admire about my mom is one of the things that used to bug me. (Sounds like a thirty-something revelation, doesn’t it?)

My mom taught me to be honest. About who you are, and about the things you love. She wouldn’t need to fly to Belize to have fun because, eh, sun+bugs+the hassle is just not for her. She built her dream house and loves being there, surrounded by her horses, their elderly pup, my college-rescue-turned-barn-cat, the 20+ deer that rest in their woods. She doesn’t apologize for knowing herself and respecting her own wishes. And even though it used to drive me nuts, these days, I get it. And I’m grateful to be raised by a woman who doesn’t bend at the whim of others wishes and who doesn’t ask others to bend at hers.

I believe it’s the combination of these two people, in addition to the influence of so many others, that led me here today. Seeking solace from screen time. Not apologizing for sleeping in, for eating out for almost every meal, and for enjoying every rum punch that’s been offered. Because it’s what I want to do. And I am full of gratitude to be able to have these teen boys with me to pass along my own love of investing in opportunities, of finding ways to enjoy the journey, and to laugh through the hurdles.

So today, as I enjoy the love and kindness granted to birthday celebrators, I’d like to extend a little celebration to my parents as well. Sending love your way from beautiful Belize! Thanks for pouring love, kindness, and openness into my heart every single day for the past 33 years.